sunday 8/23/2009 again

I hit enter to drop down to write which I do all the time and the system published my title. Oh well!! here goes.
Woke up this morning not knowing what I could cook for the family-the lack of planned income for Steve and I has been disastrous: no $$$ and feeding five people including young healthy people has depleted the pantry and I can no longer float checks-I floated so many that bounced that no one wants my business. so here I am busted and I go to make the coffee from the burnt tasting espresso blend I bought by mistake but saved just for mornings like this and what should I spy but pasta on the table and when I look in the frig to get Bebe, the cat her milk but a huge try of meat which I touch and find that the tray is filled with chicken thighs. Oh happy day, Oh happy day we shall have a proper dinner tonight even if someone has taken the bottle of red wine that i first thought we could use to make a coq a vin oh you know what I mean chicken stewed with onion and garlic and herbs and red wine-I would brown the the thighs in the bacon drippings I save from the rare occasions I cook bacon and then into the oven with the wine and some water and the vegetables. UHMM so good with the pasta.
Guess what? turns out that the "thighs" are pork chops so off in a different direction. Will probabloy brown them with flour and then cook gentlely until theyy are done. Hoping that Ann Marie has some lettuce she needs to get rid of and perhaps I have some zuchinni ready and thank tyou mother father god and for all that we have let us use this to support a world that feeds everyone and supports the intelligence and creativity native in all your humans and may the suffering fo pigs end. I feel like a cannibal when I eat pigs-I may get by without eating any but I doubt that at this point.
We had milk and I warmed it and added it to the horrible espresso toast and wonderful! there is enough milk to make biscuits and for making gravy this evening.
Still in the glow of yesterday morning when I was "greeted" back by life in the fgarden and the early morning and the black cat. Free of the guilt of christianity - I think that the person who said that the crucifix is part of the darkness of the time of the Nicean Creed. I have written more than once about the morning in church when we were reciting the Nicene creed and I just "knew" that I don't believe it and I will never believe and I will never teach such lies. I just "knew" that the men who wrote those words didn't believe it but they definitely wanted those words for their servants and tenant farmers,etc in order to keep them under control. I still love Mass not for the slavation so crudely offered but for the human crteativity and out pouring of love and devotion and aspiration, for the magnificent art and discipline and the wonderful music and the incense and the deep quiet and repose. I cannot take seriously the demands of these old men who have never worked, never raised children,etc. I say Please!!!!! but I am deeply Catholic and my soul is rested when I go to Mass. It is just that it is the human expression of love and beauty and devotion that I love and no god of mine would ever expect us to hate ourselves and wallow in self-hatred but would rather emphasize the words of Jesus and the call to love.