12/7/09

12/7/09

So Happy Birthday John Stewart and Tom Waits-two of those born on the anniversary of Pearl Harbor/ Big advertisement about remembering the day but John Kennedy's murder went unacknowledged this year.
And I have decided not to linger longer in the past. Got the book with Thom Hartman on the Kennedy murder and now I think I understand and as usual the ugly human reasons,trite really-hatred and resentment-so common and history is changed. I must say it was better that the coup on Cuba did not succeed or rather that is how I see things. We would have no doubt had to go to war with Russia over that and god knows where that would have ended. Kennedy was out of his mind due to the Addison's condition-the non-functioning adrenal glands and the meds used to compensate. Seems to me that he would have led us into WW111-sad to say that but so it appears to me at this point.
I still think that there were more than just the Mafia and the right wingers involved due to that big barbecue the night before out at the Hunt brother's ranch and perhaps that will never be known but the Thom Hartman book cleared up a lot of things for me sad though I am. Definitely lost a hero there. Would love to hear about Robert Kennedy's journey from that point; he changed much to the point of his campaign for the Presidency which of course ended in his murder. How different things would have been with him and not Nixon. I remember walking up to the corner of 8th and Harrison and seeing the headlines: Nixon in a landslide or something like that. I was silent and perhaps had an intuition of the life to come. I was young just old enough to vote and I remember feeling the weight of the public opinion that could be the opposite of my own.
Had an intuition to call Gerald for money. I am broke due to family issues and I saw Gerald in a dream and would like to ask him to contribute without making a big issue of it. Today in the light of day I am not so sure but we are really broke and I don't think money is coming from the State since they are not sending out UIB/DIB checks AND this is all covered up in the media. This is outrageous and really scares me for us, the common folk. the Daddy Warbucks, etc are just doing as they please and fuck us because they own everything,EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!
I think of work for the County and how many years I spent there. Driving through Richmond brings up sad memories of regret and failure-the time of the first Saturn return through my 6th-what a mess I was in those years of Roland ,Devaki and alcohol. shish!!!!! glad to leave that all behind but it comes back when I travel those streets. I remember this as the lowest part of my life and my psychiatrist of the time pointing out that the problem with Roland and I and my friends was the class thing not the race thing. I just hated myself for getting wrapped up with him but he was the only protection against Devaki and coming out as a lesbian which I guess I am but I didn't jump on the chance to be with Julie who was much nicer and very wealthy and so much fun but I just couldn't respond to her physcially and find men much more erotic and stimulating. Now with my beloved Steve I find that we are very well matched in terms of similar outlooks and desires and the sex is wonderful without any of the struggles of my earlier years.
Dr Oz is on the TV and he sounds very fascist to me. Advice on how to have the most beautiful, brightest healthiest babies but of course you must be American middle-class.